Have you ever felt exhausted after spending time with certain people? After spending just an hour with them, you're completely exhausted? You might have encountered what’s known as "energy vampires." We've all come across them at some point.
What we often overlook is that some people have the opposite effect they energize and uplift us. These individuals hold the key to building strong, successful relationships.
Let’s explore this further. Have you ever noticed how some people simply light up a room? They make you feel noticed, listened to, and appreciated. After interacting with them, you leave feeling energized and motivated. How do they do it?
As it turns out, there’s some science behind this magic, often referred to as positive social energy. The best part? You can use it to enhance every relationship in your life, whether it's with your partner, friends, or colleagues.
What is Positive Social Energy?
Positive social energy, a concept studied by Kim Cameron at the University of Michigan, refers to the ability some people have to inspire and energize those around them. Cameron and his team investigated why certain workgroups are highly productive while others are not. The difference, they discovered, lies in the presence of a "positive energizer" at the center of the productive group.
This isn't just a workplace phenomenon; it applies to all kinds of relationships—romantic, family, and friendships. On the flip side, "energy drainers," or energy vampires, sap enthusiasm and motivation from others.
Seven Ways to Build Positive Energy
Here are some key aspects of becoming a positive energizer:
1. Show genuine appreciation: Take a moment to sincerely recognize and appreciate the people around you. Whether it's a partner, friend, or coworker, acknowledging their unique qualities and contributions makes them feel valued and respected. Studies show that expressing gratitude toward your partner significantly improves the overall quality of the relationship.
2. Be supportive: Everyone goes through tough times. Showing kindness and support during these moments strengthens your bond. Think about a time when someone was there for you during a hard period your loyalty to them likely runs deep.
3. Forgive and move on: We all make mistakes. Holding onto grudges weighs you down. By forgiving and letting go, you not only improve the relationship but also feel better personally. This doesn’t mean allowing yourself to be taken advantage of, but if it’s just resentment, it’s healthier to release it. Forgiveness benefits both you and the other person.
4. Celebrate the good: It’s easy to focus on the negative, to complain, or criticize. But this can bring everyone down. Focus on the good things and celebrate every success, even the small ones. Whether it’s an achievement at work or a fun moment with friends, highlighting what’s going right can lift everyone’s spirits.
5. Find meaning in your actions: Remind yourself of the impact your efforts have. Realizing that your work or actions make a difference can be incredibly motivating and fulfilling.
6. Embrace core values: Respect, honesty, and kindness are essential. When people know you uphold these values, they feel safe and appreciated around you.
7. Prioritize your well being: This might be the most important step. Prioritize your physical, mental, and emotional well being. It's tough to help others when you're drained. When you feel good about yourself, it's easier to share positivity with those around you. In this sense, self care isn’t selfish it’s an act of service. It helps you show up as the best version of yourself.
Practical Steps to Apply Positive Energy
Here are a few small actions you can take daily to get started:
- Daily gratitude: Each day, give someone a sincere compliment or express your appreciation. It might be a friend, family member, or colleague. Write them a note, call them, or send a text. Your words will brighten their day and you'll feel better too.
- Active listening: In a time when it's rare to find someone truly paying attention, give people the gift of your full focus. Be fully engaged when someone is talking. Show you care by listening closely and responding with empathy.
- Practice forgiveness: Write down any lingering grudges or negative feelings in a journal. Think about them, then work on letting them go, and focus on moving forward with a positive attitude. Remind yourself of the lessons learned from challenging times. By letting go, you free yourself.
While developing positive social energy can greatly improve your relationships, not every interaction will be perfect. Some people may not respond positively, and that’s completely okay. The key is to do your best. When dealing with difficult people, balance empathy with self care.
Conclusion
Infusing your relationships with positive energy can have a huge impact on both your personal and professional life. By focusing on gratitude, support, and genuine human connection, you create a more fulfilling and uplifting environment for yourself and those around you. Plus, it’s a lot more enjoyable!